a story of a meeting ..

Ten years ago in Paris on March 20, 2007, I met Bill for the first time. I didn't understand what was happening, so I was overwhelmed by a strong emotion. Or I didn't want to understand .. 
I kept repeating myself in my head: "Nothing will be the same as before". I already knew that this story would bring me much pain.
Since this meeting, I have never been able to open my heart to another person, to open another book . 

And today, I am still unable to close this book. Even if my reason tells me to close it. My heart says No. ...